Sideways, sideways; always sideways.
Sideways is a essential for a goalkeeper, or a boon for a farmer working the seabed, but I’m a salesman;
Sideways enslaves me to the horizontal. Yes, I don’t have to turn 90 degrees when squeezing past people, I can sidle past
Sideways. But when you have the Atlantic Ocean to contend with, space is not a problem.
Sideways stops me cuddling my crablets when they have a cut to their claw.
Sideways prevents me from scuttling into the arms of my amore.
Sideways on stairs is not straightforward. Yes, we’re not fazed on a skyscraper’s ledge, as we slide
Sideways by default; but we also don’t have the height to be able to see how far up we are.
Sideways isn’t a choice that we make, but a lifestyle we are forced into
Sideways. This may be mordant, but being a crab means you learn to see the world slightly